sorry much

okay.. im not that hot anymore but just now i cant think of any VALID reasons why im the cause of our maid mama berantikan last time. she didnt tell me anyway. balik2 ku tanya. WELL if pasal aku bagitau mama yang pasal maid atu nda bisai menjaga mulah nini, n mulah nini complained sakit la apa la, kasar la arah mulah nini, nda kan ku biarkan kalii. tantu ku bagitau mama. macam tah ia tau apa rasa mulah nini masa atu. menjenguk pun jarang. i might not know what mulah nini really rasa time atu tapi mun sudah balik2 complain tu nda kan d biarkan saja. ingat tunggul mulah nini atu kan d buat catu. tantu la ku bagitau mama. n the other story tau jua ia pasal apa maid atu kana berantikan.. n it was langsung nada kena mengena dgn aku. how can she said that it was my fault? bukan plg ku kan minta puji yang aku take care mulah nini labih ckit but pada2 deh becakap anie.

mgaj. ntah eh. baru tadi ku becakap pasal mulah nini arah kwn2ku yang aku nyasal before she passed away dulu aku nda brapa menjaga. slalu ku beckp arh kwn2ku aritu. i did jaga but nda fully2 like we supposed to jaga someone when org really2 sakit. i always menyasal about it eversince she passed away. tapi apa jua bleh buatkan.. i feel like a jerk those times. ada ku msg drg time mulah nini sakit bnr, ada drg ingau kan lawat tarus? duii. n the saddest part was, masa aku baru kan lawat mulah nini balik malam atu, mulah nini macam menunggu masa saja lagi. nyasalku lagi. then subuhnya inalillah... she passed away. 29 June 09. yes ppl i know im bad. just say whatever u want i know im bad because i didnt take care of her much when she was still alive. n for the first time i think after she passed away, i dreamed of her last nite. skajap saja.. al-fatihah to her.

n i admit last sunday i was such, like she said, ungrateful imbecile. i should have helped her. im really sorry for that. i did feel really ungrateful after what i've said. n i didnt realised that my voice tinggi panya.. until my mum tagur tadi. mun rasanya kan tau dua hari turut2 bah ku kana ceramah oleh mama. jgn th watir. she did her part as a mother. im sorry for that. i wanna say sorry this morning but muanya cematu atu malas tah ku dulu. tapi yang buat ku marah lagi kana ucap pemalas. yes i am makin malas masa anie to do chores tapi apa kurangnya ia? baru jua few years nie aku malas2an. few years back sapakan slalu buat chores? sapa slalu masak2? time pindah rumah anie balik sapa yang malar tolong mama membersih2kn? sapa yang malar bejaur masa atu? ia? baru jua baru2 anie rajin kali. ntah la ah wallahualam. so now ada partku malas, ada partnya ia malas. ada partnya aku rajin kali. ada partnya ia rajin. so like, sama saja. nda pyh tah kan brabis ngucap org. or more to malas kali ah aku masa anie? too bad.. sorry saja. n tau ku plg i dont have that MUCHO MONEY as her. im sorry if i didnt spend for the family much like her. awu insyaallah ku pigang cakapnya atu. no more favour. sorry saja nyusahkan saja.

left squid.

im in the mood to blog a little.. ya right. today we jezzes start main netball back. uh.. after AWHILE.. hehe ngalih la rasanya. tapi siuk. and bari banci tadi 2nd last game ah, macam apa bini2 beteriak2 nda tau malu. skadar manang centerpass. macam orang gila ada pulang. nda tah diri sadar tu. OVER. bwahaha. awal ku ngucapkan orang ah. pastu ada lagi la.. nda ku ingat apa. heh. forget it. *sudah ku ngucapkan la :p*

after that, we went to ts makan penyet. cemana tah kan kurus tu? haha mula2 plan kan minum saja nie.. sudah sampai sana atu, ikut tah jua makan aku nie. skali masa balik... masa sampai sudah rumahku.. barutah deekay sibuk2 cari sotongnya. as in her car key. hehehe check2 nada... ia tpon la tempat penyet atu.. skali ada! bwahahaha! *sorry deek teketawa* so me n her went back sana la ngambil. kana ketawakan oleh mbak2 d sana atu. hehe then we jalan2 la jap nyukat gadong and kiulap. buang boring. lama nda jalan2 kan. plus.. hehe gang S tah ku sudah nie.. nda segang sma c yuni lagi. haha.. tak paham kan? adeler~

bah wanna sleep. esok banguns awal. *right ninz* hmm.. i dont like being incharged.. boohoo.

i don't feel a thang..

it's always always always at 3 am. haha. but i'm going to sleep soon. jarang ku tidur ahir brabis lately. tadi we kpmgians had dinner at capers. well.. my first time there.. the pizzas was okay.. the lasagne was not okay. nda nyaman. nyaman lagi ms ku membuat. ehe. and my colleagues said d sana makin nda nyaman and makin sikits. but siuk la tadi. ceta2. and i sat next to tha boss! so yeah, learn/know some new things we don't know. hehe

yeah.. after that.. i went to cb with a friend. it was late thou. very. teseliur bah. then we off to our friend's house. chilling~ and i went home late. heh. once in a while. *it was =) but nah.. =)* i rarely go out since puasa.. hehe busy kan.. and raya also bah.. oh, i didn't go out raya-ing much also.. tsk.. it's getting worse every year. i just stayed at home most of the time. budak baik. :p

oh the-kind-of-audit started already.. and heh i wish it will be smooth all the way~ no big big big bumpy roads. amin amin. ;)

i want 80cents ice-cream!

hey~ went out for sungkai just now with the berries~ yang can come ja me, yuni, day and deek. boring sikit nda complete. hehe but ok la have fun sikit. took a lot of pics jua. silly pics ;p. nanti tah upload keh? or if ku rajin later i'll upload. nda ramai la tadi tempat we went d jessamine at rbrc atu which is good. nda banyak hassle. after sana c yuni teseliur kan makan ice-cream. haha i suggested ke mcd and buy that 80cents sundae. c deekay mau ke giant.. its 65cents there. malasku durang anie. last2 kesana tah jua... apanah d makan ah.. ice-cream $2.00. malasku. aku expect ice-cream jenis scoop2 atu pulang. haha kelaie2. nda la. sekalinya im still hungry so i bought corn cup atu and lekor. hehe after that, we went to komunis bali dvd. okay~~ ima dvd buff now (nde jua la.. otw la ;p) and napa ka ya. maybe i don't have anything else to do other than bejalan and other than doing some other-other usual stuffs. ceh. haha tapi anie saja2 buy la tuk stock meliat dvd time2 buat cookies nanti. ada jua kan d liat kan. *winks* i have few more sungkai outings to go.. but i think i'll have to pass some. i'm sorry~ i'm gonna get busy with cookiesing.

*yer done leaning?*

Stimulate your heart, stimulate your mind..

You feel it uh It must be love haha yeah it feels like love
bad boy bitch
You know how we do
Stimulate my heart surrender my mind
Look at to my eyes if forever you find
Bad boy turn good how could it be true
And all thru my pain how could it be you
How could it be new
How could it be my cheatin way thru
How could it be as me as pursue about to get a white suit
About getting a night job just to keep my mind grounded in you
and in all that jazz what else can make a nigga spend all his cash
A chick with a face
A chick with a little skinny waist
A chick with a mind to match her nice taste
plus I got the mind to snatch you like wait
Why you wanna tie me up like rick james
reverse the porche as long you got them
Little high heels on its on

This is something I never wanted
Since I met you I’ve been on it
I think about you all the time
Can get you of my mind
I know this can’t be love ( I know this can’t be love)
But baby it must be love (But baby it must be love)
Thinking im going
All of the way
I wanna show you but I’m afraid
I know you say it’s all on me
Maybe tonight I let you see
Couldn’t this be love (I know this must be love)
But baby it must be love ( I know it must be love)
Don’t wanna give in to you so easily
But I can’t even fight that you made me so weak
And I can’t understand what you doing to me
But I like it (I like it) I like it (I like it)

I heard you whisper something to me
Hold me close now baby don’t leave
Emotions taking over
Some things controlling me
I know this can’t be love ( I know this can’t be love)
But baby it must be love (But baby it must be love)

What am I feeling its getting stronger
And I can’t hold it back for much longer
All though we trynna be cool it’s all because of you

I know this can’t be love (I know this must be love)
But baby it must be love ( Baby it must be love)
Don’t wanna give in to you so easily
But I can’t even fight that you made me so weak
And I can’t understand what you doing to me
But I like it (I like it) I like it (I like it)

Nah in a minute Imma have check myself to the psych ward
I’m going crazy and I don’t know what I’m fighting for
See it’s too easy to run from this and my mind says
I can’t really Fu** with this
trynna resist but every passionate and kiss blows my mind
Like a terrorist you can be mine on some forever shit
I’m a treat believer trynna be tough but the look in your face it’s so delectated
It’s Something you do if you got me in trance you got me running and doing shit
I aint used to doing (that’s right) thinking bout a chance
Maybe a slowdance maybe we hold hands fur coats and france(keep going)
Go diving on beaches with white diamonds in the sand then we handgliding over cans ? And then you can be my number one fan and I could be your love
In the club for as long as the song lasts

The way you make me feel is got me crazy
Tell me what you doing tonight
I’ll be there right away
Take a ride with you home late
Ohh when you know I giving my love
Boy I so glad that you’re mine (you are mine)
Do you wanna spend some time with me

Don’t wanna give in to you so easily ( don’t wanna give in)
( don’t wanna fight in) But I can’t even fight that ( you made me so weak) you made me so weak
And I can’t understand what you doing to me (yes I like it)
But I like it (I like it) I like it (I like it)

Don’t wanna give in to you so easily ( don’t wanna give in)
( don’t wanna fight in) But I can’t even fight that ( you made me so weak) you made me so weak
And I can’t understand what you doing to me (yes I like it)
But I like it (I like it) I like it (I like it)

kinda like some-some of the lyric. yeah. and daaa slalu bah.. sudahku kan datang class atu, nda tia ada class esok. i mean krg. daaaa nasib c kawan anie bagitau kalau nda macam apa ku menunggu disana ah. or wasting my 5mins drive kesana. minyak bah tu. haha no la i'm just joking about minyak. hee. yeay! no class~ so no class. apakan. dududu~ ;)

hapi mami no?

hellew. jay said my song is kinda.. apa ia cakap ah tadi? dull kah? haha kira ia nda like la.. plus he do not like p.diddy. yeah.. it is kinda slow mo.. i guess it represent my mood nowadays. ehe. idk what is happening to me but i do feel not that happy. tsk. maybe because i have many things to do. haha like my assignmentSS.. s in CAPS.. haha and my room is still a MESS, and, its not that i do not like listening to hari raya songs, but everytime that komunis plays raya song, i think about my cookies yang alum lagi start bebuat. heh. and if ku meliat calendar jua. damn. 2 weeks lagi yo kan raya! sigh. banar plg ku biasa buat on the 3rd week but this year macam... ntah.. lapas done our job there nanti, i'll be in office doing another job. and another. and another. continuosly? of course la ah.. i know i'll be busy in office nanti tu. then i have classes again.. then i have ASSignmentS lagi... oh yes i have test next week too. and its law. uh. not my favourite. didn't come to class again tadi but i'll come tomorrow. hopefully~ ceh manakan.. so yes, i have a lot to think of now. including small little thing that i shoudn't be worrying about.

but fyi, i am feeling fcuked up now.. idk why.. i hope it is not because of that.small.little.thing~ sigh. toodles peeps. be happy

Must Be L♥ve

i was browsing my sis's new downloaded songs folder and of all the song i stole from her, i like this the most! you can hear it right? it's Cassie, Must Be L♥ve. i can't decide which version i wanna add in, so.. i add it all! too bad the instrumental version is not there, i would've add it in too. hehe i like the melody wa.. idk.. and maybe because i like cassie too. ;) she's okay. except for her latest hairdo. up to her anyway. i like the one featuring p. diddy most, and 2nd would be featuring busta rhymes. and oh, there's one featuring ja rule.. but it's not there too. sayang~ lawa tu. *sama saja* haha

bah toodles. i'm sleepy. got nothing much to share thou. idk.. so yeah, bye peeps. enjoy the song. ♥ much.